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Swinging advice

What is OnlyMeets

OnlyMeets is the premier online platform for those who enjoy alternative lifestyles and want to meet others who are into swinging, fetish, and BDSM scenes.  Our all inclusive community welcomes all genuine adults who are keen to discover and explore more than just the mainstream.

We are a welcoming community keen to help our members find new adventures and make new friends along the way.  Intelligent and extensive search features allow you to find whoever and whatever you are looking for  both locally and nationally.

OnlyMeets loves vanilla but life would be very boring if you had to eat the same flavour each evening so if your reading this and feel the same then you have landed in the right place. 

Make 2023 your year and join now!

Why a 5000 VIP limit?

If you are experienced in the online world othen you be aware that one of the main problems facing users are fake accounts and bots, especially so when it comes to swinging, fetish, BDSM and general sex sites.  Whilst other less reputable sites may be fine with fakes boosting their user numbers we believe that genuine swingers and those who enjoy the alternative lifestyles deserve somewhere fake free.

OnlyMeets therefore decided to limit VIP profiles to 5,000 so you can be sure that you are in the company of genuine adults who are looking for kinky fun.  Whilst there is no limit to the total users on the site you can be confident that VIP users are real flesh and blood human beings.

What are the membership levels?

OnlyMeets is a premier community UK sex site where we aim keep fake profiles firmly at the door - experienced members of alternative lifestyles know that fake profiles, timewasters, picture collectors and bots are a pain which is why we keep the majority of our services locked behind a paywall.  We know other sites may state they have much larger networks but in truth nobody will ever know their real user count.

The site is free to join for everyone and we offer all accounts basic functionality such as searches, messaging and uploading pictures, but to improve the online experience we ensure these are limited daily to deter fake profiles.  For full unlimited access to all areas of OnlyMeets we allow a limited number of VIP's who are able to unlock all areas of the site for a monthly cost of just £5 or an annual cost of £50 which guarantees their status for a year.  When a VIP place becomes available these are offered on a first come first served basis, we do not operate waiting lists so make sure you get in there quick if a VIP opportunity comes along.  There are no contracts or recurring charges so there is no commitment, just come and go as you please - no pun intended 😉

Do I have to upload a face picture

Absolutely not, we understand and respect that some of our community prefer to meet and play with total discretion and anonymity for various reasons. These members are often photo-verified and if confirmed as a VIP you can be assured these are genuine users - bots, timewasters and fake profiles rarely get behind paywalls.

Whilst members who do have photo's will get more attention, more messages and more meet requests we fully get that many do not wish to have their neighbours, friends or work colleagues knowing their secret fetishes and what they get up to behind closed doors.

OnlyMeets respects the privacy and individual choices of all of our members so our platform is built so all genuine kinksters can be as open or as private as they wish.

What pictures can I upload?

We wouldn't be much of a swinging, fetish and BDSM site if we didn't allow our members to upload pictures of nudity and those of a sexual nature.  All pictures can be set to public or private, we do not discriminate and you are in control at all times.  OnlyMeets has a zero tolerance approach for any pictures that we believe to be fake or edited, these will be removed and deleted.  


OnlyMeets provides an open and diverse platform for people of all interests to discover new friends and aqaintances in a safe respectful environment.

How to improve your profile

To get the best out of OnlyMeets it is important to spend some time setting your profile up so that it gives others a clear picture of who you are and what you are looking for.  If you need some help then follow our easy guide for improving your profile.

» Pictures are always a great way to show off your talents so take some time and make sure you upload clear images that define who you are and what you can bring to the party.  Although many choose to keep face pictures private a good profile picture really will help you stand out in the crowd.  Remember first impressions do count.

» Complete as much of your profile as you can and be honest.  There is someone for everyone so there is no need to exaggerate or tell fibs, just be open about yourself and what you are looking for.

» Photo verify so that members have confidence in your profile. This is especially important for those who do not wish to have any public pictures as it allows other users to see you are real.  Photo verification pictures are deleted once they have been used to verify your sex and approximate age. Remember nobody likes a catfish.

» VIP if you are able to do so.  We operate a limited number of VIP's within the site who have full access, unlimited messages, searches and extra benefits that can help you find more meets.  We cannot guarantee that spaces will be available so if the option comes along then VIP up and open your options as wide as possible.

» Engage in the Lounge and share your views and opinions in a respectful manner. We have various rooms that cater for all manner of fetishes so you are sure to find a topic of interest. Many of our community members have met through the Forums and it is a great way to find people with common interests. The more you get involved the more you will get back.

Remember, Rome wasn't built in a day but the more you put into your profile and the more you engage with OnlyMeets members the more you will get back.  True Story!

How do I photo-verify?

In order to photo verify please write your username and "OnlyMeets" on a piece of paper and upload as normal with a clear face picture.  Once verified your profile will show a tick box to confirm you are a real human being, are of the approximate age stated in your profile and are of the nominated sex.  Once verified the picture is permanently deleted and cannot be used on your public or private profile.

Photo Verification is free and optional to all members but we strongly recommend that you take advantage of this feature as it will greatly improve your chances of meeting new people as it earns trust within the OnlyMeets community.

What are the search features?

OnlyMeets caters for many different kinks including swingers, BDSM, no strings meets, group fun, swinging clubs and many other fetishes so we aim to offer a huge range of search features which include;

→ Location
→ Age
→ Sexuality
→ Height
→ Sexual Interests
→ Verified Profile
→ Smokers
→ COVID-19 Vax status

There are many more options for searches and we are expanding these regularly.

What are Adult Clubs

The fetish scene in the UK is huge and many Adult Clubs cater for events including BDSM and S&M but many clubs also offer evenings devoted to the LGBTQ+ communities.  OnlyMeets has provided a detailed section for Swinging Clubs, Feitsh Venues, Party Events and Gay Sauna's where you can find the latest details, address and club facilities.  If you have never been or are simply interested in learning more about alternate lifestyles then check them out.


There will be regular updates to this section with the help, support and ongoing recommendations from site members and of course the Club owners who make these places so special.  Should you wish to add your suggestion to our site please contact us here with their details and we will try our best to add it.

What are the age restrictions?

OnlyMeets is restricted to 18's and over.  If we have any reason to doubt the age of a community member then we reserve the right to suspend the account until proof of age can be provided.

For those who are over 65 we have introduced an additional safety feature to ensure that those deemed at "High Risk" can join our site.  OnlyMeets firmly believes in equality, inclusion and fairness but we also follow the medical science and their data advises that risks from COVID-19 are far greater for the over 65's, therefore we have a duty of responsibility to ensure all our members over 65 are not deemed "High Risk" before allowing them on the site.

First and foremost we are a site where people meet for sexual engagements and we have a duty of care to ensure that vulnerable members are not exposed to risk, whilst this policy may offend some we stand by our decision.  For those over 65 who can provide a medical certificate from their doctor stating they are not classed as "High Risk" we will happily provide them with a free annual pass.

What is Blackbook?

Blackbook is a secure private note station provided by OnlyMeets that cannot be seen by other members so you can store personal notes, telephone numbers, reminders and anything else you don't wish to keep on a personal mobile device in complete safety.

You can find your Blackbook in your profile page and all users are required to acknowledge this feature once they have registered for the site.

Is OnlyMeets private and secure?

OnlyMeets operates with a secure socket layer certificate (SSL) provided by Encryption Everywhere DigiCert and you will see the lock sign in the address bar to show that your data is encrypted, secure and remains safe at all times. 

OnlyMeets is registered with the Information Commissioners Office and we follow all UK laws to ensure your data is protected at all times.  At no time will your data be shared with any other third party without your explicit consent.

I need to report a member

In the unlikely event you need to report a member please contact our support team here who will help with your concerns as soon as possible.  OnlyMeets take complaints seriously and will assist wherever possible to ensure our platform remains a safe and fun environment for all everyone.

I have a suggestion?

OnlyMeets has been self-built in a large part by it's community who provide continued feeback, suggestions and sometimes even coding help to build and secure our platform and we rely on members to tell us what they like, what they don't like and what they want us to develop.


Please  contact us here with any ideas or blue sky moments you have that could possibly allow us to build an even more features we will always listen and build when we can, that is a promise.

How do I contact support

Support can be reached though our Contact Us page.


We encourage our community to provide as much feedback as possible, positive (and negative) so we can all work together to improve the OnlyMeets platform.


Remember this site is your site, built for you so love it, feed it and lets work together to build a community we can be proud of.

How do I delete my account?

Should you wish for some time away from OnlyMeets your account can either be hidden or deleted.  In the event of account deletion all profile data and pictures are permanently erased from our servers and cannot be recovered.  We recommend that profiles be hidden if you are looking to take a break rather than leave for good.